What High School Has Taught Me

No, this is not going to be a silly, sarcastic pre-homeschooled-er's post about public high school. I may poke fun at them a little, but I'm not sure yet. I want to thank my parents for putting me in high school, because I've learned so much.
Never thought I'd be thanking them for this, but I am.

The first day of high school, I was terrified. There were so many people who knew what they were doing and where they were going and even all the freshmen looked as cool and calm as cucumbers and here was short little me- couldn't see over the heads of the tall people too see the numbers of the halls, my legs were to short to walk as fast as I could, and my knees were shaking, despite the fact that I had eaten a HUGE breakfast that morning (force fed by mom, which is actually a good memory O.O).
[And speaking of scared freshmen...Mr. Laine, don't you think it would have been good to put up the signs for the halls *before* the middle of the school year? Just saying. No offense.]
But as I've been walking these long, white and purple and echo-y halls that make your footsteps echo when you're out of class, I've learned something.
Not just something.
I've learned a lot.
Much more than any one teacher has taught me in a class. I've learned by watching people. Talking to people. Getting to know people before I judge them. Learning that when a jerk calls the girls at Northern "The Northern Sluts" he's wrong. So very wrong.
I was riding the bus home with my boyfriend one day and we were discussing our greatest fears- besides losing each other.
"My greatest fear is going blind," He stated.
"Mine is going deaf. I don't mind going blind as much as I do going deaf," I answered, looking out the window at a pond we were just passing by. The sunlight was reflected off of it, and it was a pretty sight.
"You'd miss out on that," he said, gesturing out the window. "You'd miss seeing our kids grow up...sunsets/sunrises on the beach...storms...so much. Why are you not afraid of it?"
I told him the reason. Truth is, I'd realized it just days before. "Because...it would make it easier for me to get to know people without judging. Maybe those girls that we see dressed as sluts aren't really who we think they are. Cause if you get to know them...they're just as human as we are. They've been hurt. They're just like us. But if I can see...it makes me automatically stereotype them. Whereas if I were blind, I wouldn't worry about appearances."
Yeah. That's one thing that high school has taught me. To not care about what people look like, but rather to get to know them.
Another thing is to accept people the way they are. No matter the religion, beliefs, lifestyle, or color preferences (I stuck that one in just for fun).
Ok, so some of you from Northern who are reading this are probably laughing at me right now (Chris? Evan? Kevin?) and saying, "High school sure as heck didn't teach me that."
But just give me a second to explain. I come from a different world. No, sorry, not Narnia or anything. But rather a world of Amish people and Charity People. It would take to long here to describe them in full, but let me say, there, everyone is insecure, and from what I remember and saw there, they really tend to judge based on what you are wearing and what you look like. There is more pressure there to 'fit in' then there is anywhere else I've ever been.
Here, in this world, there isn't as big a struggle to cover up the insecurities. Or maybe its just me growing up and learning to look people in the eye instead of at their clothes. Or maybe I can see it because I know exactly how they're feeling. Cause I can see, sometimes, the sheer terror or having their cover blown. Of not being who everyone thinks they are, or sometimes even who they think they are or want to be.
High school has taught me to not be afraid to stand up for what I believe in. If someone says they don't believe in God, ok, well, that's their beliefs. I'm not going to condemn them or leave them because of that. I have a lot to learn from them, though, cause I would love that kind of faith.
High school has taught me that there are indeed people that aren't always going to love me. And they will let me know that in no uncertain terms. No one's going to sugar coat anything for me anymore- I'm not in the safety of my home.
It took awhile to get used to that.
People say I adapt fairly quickly to my surroundings, and that's true. I can' quickly get used to where I am and form a routine.
But its kind of hard, when you're used to people sugar- coating the truth into something that you want to hear or so that it will be easier to hear, to have someone tell you to your face that you are a bitch and they want nothing to do with you.
Or, when you're used to being safe at home and now you have to be careful of that creep that follows you down the hallway making obscene gestures or the one in science class that loves telling you everything he'd like to do to you if you two were alone.
But, believe it or not, this has been good for me. It's taught me to face the real world, however ugly it might be. I don't want to crash and burn when I finally leave home (and that was not an impatient finally either). I want to be able to cope with what I see, hear, and have done to me.
High school has taught me to quit hiding in my shell and to be who I've been inside all this time...the time I've been hiding.
I think that's why I made so many 'fake friends.' They thought I was some little angel that went to church every sunday and read the bible every day and did all that good religious stuff.
Not true.
I believe in God.
That's about it right now.
I could have a cussing match with your daddy right now.
I just might win.
I can sing some of the dirtiest music around. I'll know every lyric, and whether you believe it or not, I know what those lyrics mean.
There are three guys, besides my boyfriend, that tell me daily that they love me. Yeah, me.
Yep, high school's taught me some good things and some bad things.
And I'm sorry for focusing on the bad things for a minute. Let me get back to what I was saying.
High school has taught me to not be afraid of the mean people- they're there for a reason, to show me that even the worst of people need love. Love that I can give. And if they won't accept it, well, it takes all kinds of people to make the world spin, and what I can't change I'll have to live with, there's others who will benefit more from the help.
High school has given me a place to start fresh, a place where, when I first came, virtually no one knew me. There were two people that I had met once before. They barely remembered me, and they knew nothing of my past.
High school gave me a place to take a deep breath, and make a new reputation. There are a few places where some things were said about me that weren't true.
Things that hurt me, and made me lose friends.
And even after those things were cleared up, those friends were still gone and I never gained them back. There was still an air of reserve and caution around me, cause no one ever knew when I would up and do something insane.
I must say, high school has given me knowledge that is invaluable. Sometimes its invaluable because its so bad no one would buy it, sometimes invaluable because its so awesome no one *could* buy it.
But sometimes, the good and the ugly are inseparable. You have to take some ugly if you want all the good.
And for some kids, like me, coming from homeschool to high school is what it takes to get us to wake up to reality. Wake up and realize that outside our safe home walls, there is a whole world at our finger tips, waiting for this generation to grab it and change it for the better.
High school just might be what it takes to get your kid to realize that there's a whole other life out there that's waiting for them. A life, that without high school, they will never experience. They will never be able to experience laughing with the class at the class clown. They will never be able to experience the feeling you get when you're standing with the band and you know you've all just stood up for something together. They will never get to come home hoarse from a football game that you cheered yourself to death at with your marching band. they will never be able to flip through a yearbook and say, "Hey, that was my spread. I did that by myself. I took those pictures, interviewed those people, and wrote that story."
High school has taught me to be punctual, to take my life seriously, and to listen when people talk to you.
So maybe all of you who grew up in public school or who are in public school are thinking either, "Well, yeah, who didn't know that?" or, "Come on, no one learns that in high school."
Well, this is what I've learned.
And I'm learning even more.